Top reporter quits plum job after 75 years

25 October 2012

Exactly a week after Newsweek decided to shut shop and on the eve of the reverse-sting that caught Zee News with its pants down, Clark Kent has walked off his job at The Daily Planet as the world’s longest serving reporter, bemoaning the state of journalism.

He would have completed 75 years of service next year.

“Why am I the one sounding like a grizzled ink-stained wretch who believes news should be about – I don’t know – news?” Mr Kent asked his publisher Perry White in a widely reported sting operation.

This is not the first time the temperamental reporter, who has often shown a penchant for wearing his underwear outside, has left the paper. When Galaxy Broadcasting bought The Daily Planet in 1971, Mr Kent had a short spell as a broadcaster before returning to the paper.

Mr Kent declined to answer queries but a spokesman for his PR company said:

“This is really what happens when a 27-year-old guy is behind a desk and he has to take instruction from a larger conglomerate with concerns that aren’t really his own… He is arguably the most powerful person on the planet, but how long can he sit at his desk with someone breathing down his neck and treating him like the least important person in the world?”

There are no indications what the ageing reporter, who has been secretive of his family, plans to do next, but online speculation suggested he might opt for a career, well, online.

“I don’t think he’s going to be filling out an application anywhere,” his PR man said.”He is more likely to start the next Huffington Post or the next Drudge Report than he is to go find someone else to get assignments or draw a paycheck from.”

A spoof animation video from Taiwan, which imagines Mr Kent behind a McDonald’s counter, invited suggestions what other career options existed before him.

Also read: All fun and no work makes Tintin a good boy

If Steven Spielberg has a problem in casting Tintin…

Billions of blue blistering barnacles!!!

Tintin publisher Leblanc passes away

About these ads

One Response to “Top reporter quits plum job after 75 years”

  1. sumathics Says:

    I presume you have seen it, but just in case you haven’t — Mint has offered Superman a job: http://www.livemint.com/Opinion/zmzCPWNh0g7n9S7IpKiU4H/Mint-offers-Superman-a-job.html


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 7,696 other followers

%d bloggers like this: